Have. a. happy. period. 

Can’t. do. another. thing. today.
Must. leave. folded. laundry. in. basket.
Must. let. dirty. dishes. sit.
Kitchen. floor. science. experiment.
Aviva. collected. fifty. three. pieces. of. candy.
Pearl. had. huge. bedtime. meltdown.
Now. she. is. snoring.
My. period. is. any. minute. now.
Geez. Louise.
Not. a. minute. too. soon.
Pearl. is. not. the. only. one. having. meltdowns.

Aviva. and. I. had. a. big. laugh. in. bed.
Often. our. best. time. together. is. bedtime.
after. Pearl is. fast. asleep.
I. told. her. the. usual.
which. she. thinks. is. a. spiel.
but. nonetheless. loves. to. hear.
How. I. love. her. so. much.
More. every. day.
She. made. fun. of. me. in. a.
lovey. dovey. smoochey. sugary. voice.
Said. I. should. instead. tell. her.
she. is. a. doofus.
Then. we. got. going. with. a. whole. doofy. character.
Dumb. Dan. The. Snickers. Man.
No. offense. to. the. Dans. we. love.
God. It. was. good. to. laugh. with. her.
Then. I. asked.
Do. you. want. me. to. stop. saying. it?
And. she. shook. her. head. lightly.
No.

I’m. writing. with. periods. after. every. word. on. purpose.
In. case. it. wasn’t. obvious.
At. first. the. idea. was. to. create. emphasis.
Just. in. that. first. line.
But. now. I. realize. it. is. slowing. me. down.
Slowing. down. is. something. I. need. to. practice. doing.
Slowing. down. and. feeling. feelings.
Fucking. hard. feelings.
Feelings. I. might. not. want. to. prolong. with. extra. punctuation.

Someone. recently. told. me. that. I. have. a. lot. of. words.
I. suppose. it’s. true.
Lately. though.
Lately. it. is. when. I’m. wordless. that. I. feel. most. true.
Like. today. by. the. lake.
Running. and. crying. Again.
Slowing. down. enough. to. be. honest. with. myself.
about. the. places. I. want. to. run. from.
The. places. I. might. want. to. run. to.
The. moments. when. I. think.
I. can’t. do. this.

I. remember. labor.
How. present. I. was. with. each. contraction.
How. being. anything. but. present. was. not. an. option.
It. was. a. matter. of. survival.
Life. giving.
Becoming. Be. coming.
How. as. each. contraction. came. I. zeroed. in.
to. my. voice.
My. voice. was. a. tunnel. I. could. follow.
deep. and. low. keeping. me. from. flying. off. into. hysteria.
I. was. capable.
I. was. strong.
I. was. supported.
I. was.

And. now.
What?
What. now?
How. now. brown. cow.
How. a. rhyme. can. save. a. life.
How. speaking. to. a. small. child.
can. save. a. life.
How. saving. one. life. is. like. saving. the. whole. world.

Same. someone. told. me. today. I. am. better.
when. I’m. writing.
every. day.
And. so.
I. write.
I. punctuate. in. order. to. pause.
I. pause. in. order. to. save. a. life.
My. own.
So. that. I. can.
Can. be.
Can. become.
Can. be. a. good. mama. to. my. girls.
Every. day.
Every. day.
Every. day.
Can. have. a. happy. period.
Or. what. the. hell. excessive. ridiculous. copious. abundant. periods.

Always.

2 thoughts on “Have. a. happy. period. 

  1. GailNHB says:

    Powerful. Beautiful. Challenging. Moving.

    Thank you for sharing what you are feeling and seeing and learning and hearing. Your words always help me to listen to and write to and take far better care of myself.

    PS. I’ve got my period right now. Started on Saturday.
    Soul sisters, indeed. Cycle sisters too.

    Peace. to. you. in. and. with. and. through.
    all. your. periods.

    Like

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